Time out..

I did it, it's time out between us and how do I feel?

It was ok at first, then numbness came in.

But I shall remain strong..

Shall use my time and attention to become a better person instead.

This is gonna be the start of something new.. good things will come my way.

Good old times..

Was looking through my old photo albums and realized a couple of things:
1. Something's missing nowadays.. there's no more sparks or excitement in my life, my mood's strongly affected by the people around me and happiness are short-lived.
2. You can pretend to be happy, make yourself appear happy or even brainwash yourself so that you are in the 'moment', but these 'fake' feelings could never be captured.. via photography or memory because those moment was not appreciated. When you look back at the photos, you won't be able to feel those feelings again unlike other experiences where you truly enjoyed the moment.
3. I really miss the good old times. I felt that was truly happy, truly loved and I appreciated every single moment when I'm experiencing.
4. Perhaps it's because I take things for granted nowadays and experiences.. eg: dining out, is no longer special because I've had similar experiences before anyway.

Man.. I really need to do something to change these negative mentality and attitude. I'm no longer myself anymore, I'm no longer functioning anymore either.. can't even speak properly anymore.

微笑

很久没从心里笑出来了..笑吧!

Extremes

don't live in extremes.. remember

after hapiness, it's always sadness next

Now "Who am I?"

Did the test twice and came up with two different set of answers for some.. so which one am I to you?

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.
or
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
or
You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend - you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
or
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
or
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

And the real me:
1. You've got great self-confidence and you're full of charm. Most guys who get to know you will be attracted to you. You are far from sweet and proper; your intriguing personality fascinates them. Most guys find it easy to fall for a girl like you.

2. You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life. You are sincere, and your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.

3. You are a bright, cheerful and bubbly person. You are thoughtful and considerate, and like to have fun. Everybody feels comfortable around you because of your pleasant nature. When you walk into a room, people's eyes are likely to be drawn to you because of your charm.

4. Guys see you as being a thinker and a careful person. They will be really attracted to this quality in you, but you need to learn to speak your mind, otherwise people will find you too shy and quiet. Learn to relax and lighten up--it's okay to have fun sometimes. When you learn to develop your fun-loving side, guys are going to flock to your side.

5. Your boyfriend believes that you are a strong and independent person. Your confidence and cheerfulness make you an attractive person to be around, but sometimes you need to pay more attention to what other people, including your boyfriend, are thinking.

My personality love style..
You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.

I'm such a lazy bum bum..

Alright.. I've been home for X'mas, Justin's birthday & NYear Celebrations, now I'm back in Manchester. Really wanted to write.. about the trip and my relevations this winter, don't really know why but this visit home made me do a lot of thinking, but my current M&M placement is pretty hectic.. 9-5pm on most days with no Wednesday afternoons off! Kenn have always had his in Preston.. must say that it's totally unfair!!!!! I know this is what the S'ban peeps experience every single day since they've started clinical school, but Manc have allowed me to turn into a lazy bum bum. It's really really bad.. sigh.

And I'm still trying very hard to force myself to start preparing for my Progress Test this Monday as well. I must say, I've become really really lazy, my time management is awful and my brains are not working as hard as it used to.. my aim's just to read the OHCM for the test and yet I've only managed like 6 pages up till now.

Anyway, I self declared a day off. Hope I won't get into trouble for skipping an OutPatients Clinic this morning (actually I overslept and woke up 3 mins before the clinic starts). Sipping Old Town White Coffee now, hopefully this will motivate me to start revising and STOP MAKING THIS POST LONGER AND LONGER!

Hopefully I can pass this test.. must really psych myself to be more hardworking from now onwards, otherwise at the rate that I'm going.. I will definately have a tough time passing Year 5 finals.

I'm a CBNer...

The recent annoucement from Pos Malaysia shook the entire CBN community.. as well as many other communities, because four premier schools have been honored with special sets of Pos Malaysia stamps and First-Day covers! The four schools are: Victorian Institution, SMK Convent Bukit Nanas, SM All Saints (Kota Kinabalu) and SMK St Thomas (Kuching)


The news was released by The Star Newspaper on 13th December 2008 and within the same day, you can see CBNers posting up messages like "I'm a CBNer or Proud to be a CBNer or links to The Star Newspaper's website" on their Facebook or MSN Messanger.

I can truly understand how they felt, because I'm a CBNer as well!

Nevertheless, many others are dissatisfied with Pos Malaysia's choice of school.. for example Penang Port Sdn Bhd chief executive officer Datuk Ahmad Ibnihajar publicly voiced out his dissatisfaction in The Star Newspaper and demanded that Pos Malaysia must come out with additional stamps to honour his Alma Mater, Penang Free School.. Malaysia's oldest school.

Well we are all proud of our own schools, aren't we?

All these made me reminiscent about CBN and suddenly the school song popped into my mind. You know.. I sang this song (English/Malay version) every single morning & afternoon (only in Form 1&2) for 11 years! My primary school headmistress was so particular about the lyrics, she actually rehearsed us over and over again until we finally get it right.

Man, how I miss CBN..

CBN's School Song
English Version
CBN
The shining star of my life
You will always glow within me
And through me you will shine forth
A new light others will follow

CBN
With us your memory will stay
You will always light the way
Show us our strength and our hopes
CBN, our star forever more

So hear our song sung with spirits strong
We the girls of CBN today
We'll lift up our motto and strive to be
Simple in virtue
Steadfast in duty

So hear our song sung with spirits strong
We the girls of CBN today
The youth of tomorrow we promise to be true
For CBN we love you.

Malay Version
CBN
Sinar bintang hidupku
Bercahaya di sanubari
Sering begemerlapan
Pancar sinar untuk semua

CBN
Ingatankan bersemi
Kerana kau penyuluh hidup
Tunjukkan harapan teguh
CBN, bintang abadiku

Dengarlah suara semangat waja
Kami insan CBN kini
Teruskan cita dan usaha
Tulus dengan fadilah
Azam dengan bakti

Dengarlah suara semangat waja
Kami insan CBN kini
Bakal pemudi harapan negara
Kerana CBN kau tercinta

My current fav..

周杰伦-稻香
Jay Chou-Dao Xiang

Dui zhe geh shi jie ru guo ni you tai duo der bao yuan
Die dao ler jiu bu gan ji xu wang qian zhou
Wei shern mer ren yao zhe mo der chui ruo, duo luo
Qing ni da kai dian shi kan kan
Duo shao ren wei shen ming zai nuh li yong gan de zhou xia qu
Wo mern shi bu shi gai zhi zu
Zhen xi yi qie jiu suan mei you yong you

(Chorus)
Hai ji der ni shuo jia shi wei yee der chern bao
Shui zhe dao xiang her liu ji xu bern pao
Wei wei xiao
Xiao shi hou de mong wo zhi dao
Bu yao ku rang ying huo chong dai zhe ni tao pao
Xiang jian der ger yao yong yuan der yee kao
Hui jia ba hui dao zui chu der mei hao

Bu yao zhe mo rong yee jiu xiang fang qi
Jiu xiang wo shuo der
Zui bu dao der mong xiang
Huan ger mong bu jiu der ler
Wei zhi ji der ren shen xian yan shang sheh
Xian ba ai thu shang xi huan der yan sheh
Xiao yi ger ba
Gong cheng ming jiu bu shi mu dee
Rang zhi ji kuai ler kuai ler
Zhe cai jiao zuo yi yee
Tong niang der zhi fei ji
Xian zai zhong yee fei hui wo shou lee
Suo wei der na kuai ler
Chi jiao zai tian lee zui ching ting zui dao lei ler
Tou cai shui guo bei ming feng gei ding dao pa ler
Shui zai tou xiao ner
Wo kao zhe dao cao ren chui zhe feng
Chang zhe ger shui zao ler

Oh oh
Wuu hou ji ta zai chong ming zhong gern ching chui

Oh oh
Yang guang sa zai lu shang jiu bu pa xing shui

Zhern xi yee qie
Jiu suan mei you yong you

Repeat Chorus

Re-entering the blogging world..

Just realized that I've not blogged for about half an academic year

This must have been the longest period I've been MIA from the blogging world

So what's changed?

EVERYTHING..

Many things have happened this year..

New Apartment, New Car,

New Placements, New PBL Mates, New Experiences,

New Friends, Closer Friends, More Distant Friends,

New Prespective, New Style, Altered Habits,

And a different ME?!

(Just a bit I guess, hope I've retained the good and dumped the bad)

Tagged by J..

Haven't updated my blog for ages ;p guess this is why Jay tagged me..

So here goes..
1. At what age do you wish to marry? Balance would be the word, really hope I could achieve my aims first.. have a stable job & financial status before considering marriage. But then I would be in my mid 30ies by then.
2. What is your most favourite thing to do? My most most most fav thing to do.. is TRAVELLING!
3. If you have a close close close friend since childhood who loves to take away whatever you like, including guys/girls, and he/she always wins, will you still consider him/her your friend? I doubt this friend will be my close close close friend by now.. perhaps close friend ;) Everybody has a threshold.
4. What would you give up in return to eat all you want in the world and not get fat? Mm.. there's nothing that I could think of at the moment.
5. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be? To be able to live the life I want by the age of 30.
6. Do you believe you can survive without money? No
7. What are you afraid to lose the most? My partner, friends and family
8. When was ur latest best moment? Stepping into my new flat in Manchester, cause finally there's a place I can call 'Home' in UK.
9. If there’s someone that you love, would you confess to him/her? It really depends on the situation..
10. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.-Very patient, Great Dancer, Good leader
11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half? Understanding, supportive, caring, non-controlling, definately not a show-off/pretender/smoker/use foul language (hate 'em), and most of all loves me ;)
12. What is the thing that will make you think he/she is bad? Show-offs, pretenders, back-stabbers, manipulators...there's loads, c'mon.
13. What is your ambition? Be a traveller ;p doubt my parents will acknowledge this.
14. Is anyone really perfect? No way
15. If you had a choice to be rich or happy, which one would you pick ? I really don't know.. have never experienced the extremes of both to know which one I'd prefer more. Next!
16. If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change? The lazy bit of me... that's definately it ;p
17. Who is the person that you can share all your problems with? My partner and two trusted friends
18. If someone had found a path to immortality to be bestowed upon you in exchange for one of your abilities, would you take it, and what would you sacrifice for it? I don't wish to live beyond 65 years old actually. So no thanks.
19. What is the best thing that had happened in your life? Being born into this world.. to look the way I am, with the personality and characteristics that I have, to be blessed with some wonderful and true friends in my life, to have a great boyfriend and to be given plenty of opportunities & exposures to all sorts of things as I grow up.. in attempt to prepare myself to for the real world.

And so I tag...

1. Kisa
2. Li
3. HauChun
4. EeWan
5. CYin

Don't wanna wake up..

Felt like I've been dreaming for the past 6 1/2 weeks..

It started off with a long haul flight in a plane. Just couldn't get any rest.. to fill my time, I actually watched 4 movies and listened to songs in between!!

Without realizing it, I was back in KL.. my brother who was studying in NZ, my mum and sis picked me up from KL Sentral! Not bad eh my bro from NZ was involved ;p But I only had a couple of days to spend with him because he had to go back to NZ and he was also too busy 'pak thor'-ing with his gf ;p

Everything that took place after that happened too quickly..

Let see..

-There was dinner in Souled Out with Li, CYin & Sze Siew after that I finally made my first visit to Murni's with with Darren, Jay and Kenn.

-Steamboat and kareoke session at Darren's place..

-Meeting up with the juniors

-Dai pai dong feasts

-Managed to meet up with ReiKa in 1Utama before she went.. had my first sushi meal at Sakae Sushi.

-Celebrated mum's birthday

-Had my favourite sweet & spicy crab with fried mantau, as well as marmite crab at Leng Kee.

-Had quite an experience rushing between the airport then back home and immediately to Ikano because I had to send my brother off back to Dunedin, send my sister home and then rush to Ikano to celebrate Kenn's birthday!

-Chilled out at Sanctuary, The Curve.

-Went shopping in Mid Valley, The Gardens, BSV I & II, Telawi's streets, 1 Utama, Sunway Pyramid and Pavillion.. think that's all I managed ;p

-Met up with friends for tea of all sorts.. dessert, char chan teng, dai pai dong, tea houses, cafes, lounges.. you name it.

-Finally spent some quality time with Kenn.. movie, meals, just hanging out or shopping. Always feel very laid back and relaxed with him.

-Finally finally had real 'Tong Shui' at KeiTakSek, Kepong.. had so many that night, my stomach almost burst!

-Organized a PM3 weekend trip to Seremban and Melaka.. to be honest with you, it was purely a catching up and EATING SPREE. Lets see.. In seremban we mamaked and 1 hour later we went for korean food. In Melaka.. we had chicken rice ball, nyonya chendol, satay celup, durians all in one day. I even ate a Nyonya 'BaChang' and a mooncake when I got home that night. Fattening!

-Even managed to eat my fav 'chee cheong fun' at Lucky Restaurant.

-Kai Lyn also visited us and we went to Luna Bar to chill out.

-Caught up with Mingy, watched Red Cliff with her at Pavillion.. the cinema's quite nice really.

-Also tried out o'ChaCha, really liked it.

-Oh.. Jay, Kenn, Li, William, CYin, Sze Siew and I also had a Pasar malam dinner in SriPetaling.

-Then I met up with my cousin May Ling from Singapore and we had high tea with A.Michelle in 1Utama hotel. The cafe was quite nice really ;p and I would give the waiters there 100% for their services!

-I even manage to meet up with the Ballet girls, with Yong Hui missing.. went to this Indonesian restaurant in Puchong which serves really good dishes.

-Then I attended Amy's wedding in Rennaisance Hotel.. managed to meet up with many ex-CBNers.

-Organized a 5B '02 reunion in Italiannes, The Gardens.. which turned out to be quite a success. 3 teaches turned up and 1/2 of the class turned up! Had a really great time catching up.

-The CBN gang also met up for Steamboat at Yuens, Sunway Pyramid. After that, SaoYee and I went on to Zouk to meet more CBNers ;p

-Also watched Sex and the City for the second time with Li, Sze Siew and CYin.

-Then the 4 of us flew to HongKong, met up with Jay there and explored HongKong & Disneyland & Macau over the period of 7 days. Had loads of fun there.. really, I finally managed to visit WongTaiSin (Jay was nice enough to teman me there ;p), went to 'Miu Kai', finally got to have breakfast at LukYu, then went to see the LamTsuen Wishing Tree, took a ferry to Lamma Island for seafood, went clubbing in LanKwaiFong, took the newly built 360degree cable car into Ngong Ping Shan, went to Disneyland and finally made my way to Macau! We even met up with LJ, Ed and Jaycen. Unfortunately I fell ill after clubbing too much in LanKwaiFong on day 3/4.. I actually felt so rotten, it was a huge effort to drag myself out of bed every morning. Luckily I didn't give in to my desire to stay in ;p

-When I got back.. I manage to meet up with the super busy Nicole Chong ;p we had brunch in Marmalade and did a bit of shopping in Bangsar together. It's nice to meet up with your pal from high school, just to catch up and maintain the bond ;p

-Oh.. btw, I bought a new laptop this summer! A super cun HP-dv5.. guys hear this: Core2Duo (2.53GHz), 4GB ram, can't remember the size of the dedicated ram to the NViDIA Graphics card, can't remember the model number of the graphics card either.. but do know that it's quite good, built in tv tuner, HDMI compatible, blu-ray player, built in webcam and fingerprint technology. That's all I can remember ;p

-I also learned how to make Kaya ;p

-And I finally went to Yut Kee with Li, Shang, Jay and CYin for some Kinta Valley style dai pai dong breakfast. The place itself kinda of reminded me about Fung Loi in Batu Gajah.. they look quite similar therefore it's gives quite a nostalgic feel. Reminded me of my grandma, the sweets store in the alley next door, the creepy bedroom upstairs, the dark toilets, 3 KuMa's noodles and the free flow drinks from the fridge. I had kopi 'ping' and kaya, toast & half boiled eggs that day. They menu's more fusion in Yut Kee though.

-On the same day I actually went back to CBN just to have a look at my old primary and secondary school. Found out that they repainted the entire building.. I felt as if I've been transported back to primary school ;p

-After CBN, i actually went to Pavillion to meet up with Li & all.. just to hang out. We ended up in C.Club for some desserts. On my first week back in Malaysia.. I actually went to the C.Club to ask about the type of food and drinks they serve. One of the waiter actually ended up giving me a full tour of their 2 story outlet which includes the dining area, the lounge, the champagne section, diamonds section, I think there was a watch section as well and the bar downstairs. He thought I wanted to organize some big event in C.Club and given me their menu+magazine of the month along with relavent name cards. When I told HC about this story, he called me a 'Spoilt princess' planning a party! Grr... I dun mind being a princess but I will not be called a spoilt princess HC!

-Although Kenn and I didn't make it to Kogetsu, we ate at Sushi Zanmai. In Japan Sushi Zanmai's like Sushi King in KL, but I wonder if both Sushi Zanmai's from the same company. I really loved the ones in Japan, the sashimi was really fresh and sushi was really nicely prepared. The one in 1Utama was not that bad either, honestly.

-Oh yeah.. this summer I indulged myself with manicure & pedicure spas as well. Color culture is really good.. if you feel like giving yourself a treat, then you can check this place out and ask for current promotions!

-The best part of this holiday is, I got to spend time with my sis.. did quite a lot together like taking PuRiKuRas, movies, eating and shopping. Typical things that we do ;p

-And before I left, the entire family went out for dinner in Maju Palace. Really had a great time, I brought a bottle of Moet & Chandon from our collection at home, dad brought his Blue label... after a couple of drinks, everyone ended up doing more singing and dancing instead of eating ;p

-A couple of days before I left, Edward visited KL.. we met up in Jalan Alor for dinner and after that Lecka Lecka for some drinks. Vicky, Ang, CYin and Nic was there as well. On the day I left, we went to RedBox for some last minute Kareoke-ing ;p

-Met up with my mum, sis, A.Michelle and YeeLing at C.Club right after kareoke-ing as well, had a lovely brunch there. It's nice to indulge your mum and sis once in awhile don't you think ;p

My dad didn't sent me off that night.. only my mum and my sis went ;p it was really nice of Isabel for coming along, because she had to wake up at about 4-5am the next morning.. because her choir team made it to the nationals, TV3 wanted them to perform live and interview everyone of them after that. That's quite cool isn't it, too bad I left 1 day too early.

Without knowing it, I boarded the plane and was on my way back to Manchester. 7 weeks passed by just like that.. would really say that most of the things happened too quickly but I must also add that initially I wanted to do more, unfortunately I'm getting old and halfway through the vacation I got quite exhausted. BUT I really had a great time... CHEERS!